“Phil: What would you do if you were stuck in one place, and every day was exactly the same, and nothing that you did mattered? Ralph: That about sums it up for me.” –Groundhog Day
Are you feeling stuck in an unsatisfying loop?
Do you wake up each day to the same depressing job, relationship, home, and financial problems?
Do you feel like you can’t change things until external circumstances change—circumstances that are totally beyond your control?
In other words, does your life feel like the movie
It’s Labor Day, a national holiday in the US, and I’m working. And feeling so grateful for that.
I considered taking the day off. Don’t get me wrong, I am a huge believer in taking time off, in vacation, in rest and replenishment, in designing and maintaining boundaries between work and the rest of life that serve both of those arenas…and I took some gah-lorious time off this summer.
Do you feel not-so-crazy-about-yourself these days?
Are you seeing yourself acting again and again in a way that doesn’t line up with who or how you want to be?
When you start to recognize that it’s been a while since you felt good about yourself—like, since you thought, for the most part, yeah, I’m pretty great!—here’s a powerful turnaround for you:
Do you often tell yourself you’ll “figure out” the important stuff as soon as you have time?
Every night as you go to bed, you think about how you want to change your career, or improve a relationship, or start a project.
You may even get feverishly excited with ideas—and then those ideas have to wait until tomorrow.
Or next week.
Or next year.
Or whenever you have time.
Because after all, you have A Lot To Do.
You don’t have All The Money In The World.
You only have So Much Energy.
So naturally, the steps you need to take to get on purpose and on your path get shuffled to the bottom of the to-do list.
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As we launch into another holiday season*, I’m thinking of you.
Panicking that your career is not where you want it to be.
Panicking that your relationships, or lack of relationships, will never change.
You may even feel guilt on top of the panic: after all, you are so blessed, and you are supposed to be grateful.
Are you questioning everything?
“I’m feeling all this weirdness lately.
I feel apprehensive, depressed, frustrated, insecure, self-critical—all this at a time when trees are blossoming and temperatures are more—well—temperate. Spring is supposed to be a time of rebirth, of hope. Yet I feel worried and at times sad…”
What’s wrong with me?
Sure, I’m not perfect, but I’m reasonably attractive, interesting, and smart. I’ve been putting myself out there, making the time to go on dates, and it just isn’t working. I’m just not meeting anyone. Well, not anyone who’s right for me.
Are you paying attention?
What are the world and the people in it trying to tell you?
If you feel lost, it might be time to listen. up.
When I was in the midst of my own career transition, I didn’t know what I wanted to do, or even that it would involve a career change, but I
did know some sort of change was on the horizon.
And that, in and of itself, was scary as hell. Not knowing what that change would be made it even scarier.
As I was trying to figure it all out, inventing my own transition, cobbling together an outline so that I could write my own mysterious next chapter, I didn’t feel like I had a roadmap at all.