Everything – Page 10 – The Thirtysomething Coach®

Little Steps, Big Changes: Reboot Your New Year’s Resolution with a 30-Day Challenge

23 Comments / Career Change and Fulfillment, Everything, Happiness, Procrastination & Productivity, Relationships, Transitions / Carrie

Did you make big, audacious New Year’s Resolutions this year?

First, congratulations on taking the time to self-reflect and commit to a change!

Now—are you overwhelmed, disillusioned, or discouraged yet? If so, you’re in good company.

Mid-January is a time when that fresh resolve that This is the year! starts to flag for many people, as we jump back into all of the responsibilities and to-dos and habits that are still waiting right where we left them at then end of December. …

Little Steps, Big Changes: Reboot Your New Year’s Resolution with a 30-Day ChallengeRead More »

Little Steps, Big Changes: Reboot Your New Year’s Resolution with a 30-Day Challenge Read More »

Interview: From Software Programming to Public Policy

2 Comments / Career Change and Fulfillment, Everything, Happiness, Interview, Transitions / Carrie

“You can quit your job and do something else…one is not as locked in as one thinks.”

Matt tells the story of the morning carpool ride that set him on the path to a total career change. “I got to work, and went up into my office, and sat down at my desk, and said, ‘So what am I doing?’” …

Interview: From Software Programming to Public PolicyRead More »

Interview: From Software Programming to Public Policy Read More »

Just Ten Minutes: a Powerful Trick for Tackling Tasks You Hate or Procrastinate

2 Comments / Everything, Procrastination & Productivity, Relationships / Carrie

“It’s only January 7^th, and I’m already behind!”

Do you already feel “behind” in the new year? Often, we begin the new year resolving to tackle tasks we’ve historically resisted and put off.

The bigger, scarier, more time-consuming, or more overwhelming the task feels, the more likely we are to make up and believe compelling stories (read: excuses) for why this is not the right time to get started—we’ll do it later!

We are very, very good at making up these stories!

What’s more, we do this not only with tasks that we don’t enjoy, but also with activities we genuinely like to do–things that we know would bring us pleasure.

Here’s a strategy you can use the next time you think “I should,” “I need to,” or “I want to” about a task and feel the urge to procrastinate.

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Just Ten Minutes: a Powerful Trick for Tackling Tasks You Hate or ProcrastinateRead More »

Just Ten Minutes: a Powerful Trick for Tackling Tasks You Hate or Procrastinate Read More »

Why I Love the Timer

2 Comments / Everything, Procrastination & Productivity / Carrie

All you goal-makers and procrastinators out there, have you met my friend the timer?

This unassuming little tool unlocks massive productivity potential.

It may look like an inanimate object, but I give this little guy part of the credit for completing my schooling, working out, my home’s relatively organized state, staying on top of my email, and for this blog you’re reading, among many other things. I seriously don’t know where I’d be without it!

I recommend this tool to all of my clients as they tackle their own projects, and I wholeheartedly recommend it to you today.

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Why I Love the TimerRead More »

Why I Love the Timer Read More »

Are the If-Mores Holding You Back?

2 Comments / Everything, Happiness, Transitions / Carrie

One of the nastiest beasts that keeps people stuck is what I refer to as the “If-Mores.”

We tell ourselves that if only we had more (fill-in-the-blank), we would be able to do something that we long to do.

This can become an excuse not to take action.

Oh well, we say. I guess I just can’t have that.

This is usually accompanied by some major Poor me energy, along with a grumble or two of comparison to others who have the thing we wish we had more of.

Today, I challenge you to begin a journey to banish the If-Mores by doing the following exercise. …

Are the If-Mores Holding You Back?Read More »

Are the If-Mores Holding You Back? Read More »

How to Get over 20s (or 30s, 40s, 50s…) Regret

1 Comment / Breakups, Career Change and Fulfillment, Everything, Relationships, Transitions / Carrie

When reaching a “breakthrough moment” in creating positive changes in their lives, many of my clients say things like,

“I just wish I’d figured this all out sooner.”

“If only I hadn’t wasted that time in my 20s, I’d have it all together by now.”

“Why did it take me so long to see this?”

When you’ve hit upon a discovery and/or finally taken action that makes you much happier than you’ve ever been, it’s only natural to wish that you could have made that discovery or taken that action in the first place! …

How to Get over 20s (or 30s, 40s, 50s…) RegretRead More »

How to Get over 20s (or 30s, 40s, 50s…) Regret Read More »

You Think YOU’VE Got Problems? When Perspective Leads to Guilt and Shame

1 Comment / Everything / Carrie

We often feel guilty for mourning our own challenges and losses when they seem to pale in comparison to those of others.

As frustrating as small setbacks are, and as painful as larger challenges such as a breakup or a job loss can be, they can suddenly seem like not such a big deal in the light of tragedies such as natural disasters and horrific acts of violence, or a major adversity that another individual is facing.

Many people respond to the insight of perspective by throwing a bunch of guilt and shame on top of their pain—saying to themselves, “There are people with real problems in the world, and I shouldn’t be complaining about this—or even feeling bad about it.”

Then, being only human, they go on feeling bad, and feel even worse for feeling that way!

This approach is taking something with great helping and healing potential (perspective) and transforming it into something destructive (guilt and shame).

Guilt is not a helping emotion. Neither is shame.

Both emotions feed negative energy and keep you stuck—and do nothing to help those “people with real problems,” either. …

You Think YOU’VE Got Problems? When Perspective Leads to Guilt and ShameRead More »

You Think YOU’VE Got Problems? When Perspective Leads to Guilt and Shame Read More »