I’m sitting in the Moonrise Cafe in Fargo, North Dakota. I was thinking about my upcoming keynote for the Capital Coaches Conference, Venture Boldly Forward into the Unknown: Nomad Insights to Transform Your Work, Leadership, and Life, and I started thinking of you—you who, for whatever combination of reasons, are reading this post. I want to share some thoughts about decisions to venture into new places and experiences, and the surreal awe that can arise from them. 

Of all the places I’ve been on this journey, North Dakota felt among the most surreal to enter into. I’ve known for the last year or so that I would come here, but still, when I actually began to approach the state line and ultimately crossed over, I felt a little…dazzled; shaken up; unsettled; startled. 

Based on the semi-stunned response my body was having, I realized I’d crossed an unconscious boundary, and come to a place that, for most of my life, I’d never thought about as a place I would ever be. 

I felt spooked as I drove past the enormous grain silos, and wondered why I felt so spooked. (I sensed it was largely because it was round about 3 AM—a story for another day—but not entirely.) Part of it was this strong sense—not just a factual knowing, but a full-body awareness—that I was somewhere unlike anywhere I’d been, or ever imagined being. It was as though I could feel this in my cells. I was in new territory, literally. 

Of course, this has been true of almost all of the places I’ve visited on my adventure. So why was it any different from all the other places I’d never been? Why was this crossing extra intense? 

North DakotaRead More »

This year, I’m synthesizing the discoveries and lessons learned from a decade of work with coaching clients, crystallizing what helped each of them overcome their obstacles and achieve their goals. I’m sharing these key insights and making suggestions for how you can apply them in your own life. Today, let’s take a look at another key skill that can help you break through Thirtysomething Panic: Narrate with neutrality. This means making the Negative—> Neutral Shift.

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The Negative —> Neutral Shift: An Important Pit Stop on the Road to PositivityRead More »

In light of the news of the day here in the United States, I’m taking a detour from our journey through Thirtysomething Panic, and hoping to make a tiny difference in your day (and in mine) with a tool you can use if you are feeling despair, grief, rage, or fear—or file away for another time, if you don’t need it today. 

On a day on which a fundamental right has been taken away and others may be under threat, amidst so much other tragedy and suffering in the world, it is easy to despair. Here are some ways we can and do respond when despair beckons.

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Alternatives to DespairRead More »

Recently, we’ve discussed how to handle the Order of Operations problem, and how to make the Isolation —> Belonging Shift. We also met Rachel Friedman, who shared useful ideas for navigating the imperfect art of adulthood. 

 

Now, let’s dive into one of the foundational commitments that will help you break through Thirtysomething Panic (or set yourself up for success in any period of life transition): Telling the Truth.

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Tell The TruthRead More »